Small Kine Stories – Smile

Ho… Brr-ah!  Just rememba, no mattah how shiddy da day, jus smile.  Das is da main ting fo real-kine, guarans-babearans, no-step-on-da crack and break yo madah’s back.  I go tell you one story…             

I rememba wen I used to work down da grocery store, eh, and how nuts would get.  You get da old farts who stay all mad cause dey no like dey fruits in da same bag as da vegetables.  Den get da punk keeds, you know da kine future O treeple C residents, who try and shoplift da beer.  Sheet, no can even handle one befo get all buss and den palu.  No mattah, still yet they gotta try and ack hard and steal da 24 pack Bud Watah.  Hoooo, wait cuz, gets bettah.  Den dea’s da uppedy, busy-body-ness peopo wit dey Bluetoot stickin out da-side-a-da ear, neva can tell who dey stay talking too .  Dem guys is da worst kine.  Brr-ah!  No can even undastand wot dey tryin fo say or who dey tryin fo talk to.  All you can get out of dea mouths in one I stay bettah den you kine voice dat sound mo like one talking monkey wit dea “ooooo’s” and “ahhh’s”: “Oooo I would like the Grey Poupon in double paper, that’s two now, then plastic. Uh, Hold on.  Ahhh, by golly that’s great results.  Oh, please wait.  I said double paper!”             

Oh sheesh, I could go on go days and days about dem lolos and how f’d work stay or even some of dem can get.  But eh, Brr-ah!  Da main ting is fo smile yeah, cause can make one difference.  I fo real.  You neva know who stay watching like dat cute hapa wahine who is just gettin one bottle water.  Ha.  Nah, fo real kine, jus smile cause can make one difference.  I go tell you one odda story…             

Had dis one time wen one small keed wen smile at me.  Hooo, was da cutest ting.  Eh, no make dat look befo I slap you.  Anyway… I was all agro cause of dose kine people I just wen describe earliah, wen had dis tiny little keed look up and say, “Hi”, and den smile.  Brr-ah!  Wen I saw dat how could I not go “Aww da cute!” inside my head.  Or crack one smile and feel warm inside just like da kine M&M’s dat was in your back pocket all day and stay all smashed and soft?  Das right, uh?  Just wot I thought.             

So yeah… eh Brr-ah!  Just smile already ganfunnit.  I wen tell you all dat and you still frown.  I otta slap you in back-a-da head you grumpy…

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