Adventures in Urban Mysticism: WTEff….

Patterns, patterns, patterns.

Patterns.  They are all around.  When asked what is it that I do, the best explanation is “read” energy.  Perhaps, I am not a great teacher (yet) which is why I cannot connect this idea with all people.  Maybe it’s as my teacher says: never doubt yourself my Dear-uh, meet people at the level of consciousness they are at.  It’s hard when a skeptic enters the room.  It’s usually easier to read the skeptic first, it diffuses the critic as it wedges deep in the psyche.

What is it you do?  Well that was pretty general.  Second time I asked if someone wanted me to focus on something specific and declined for a general and then was displeased.  I don’t take it personal but then I question again, what the (insert here) am I doing.  What is the point of this work?

Perhaps it was the opposite of the wave I rode this morning, the antithesis necessary to balance the energy of the day.  I woke up seeing the levels of consciousness clearly, choosing my course.  I was praised by someone who just met me and promoted my spiritual work then I even somehow walked into a radio interview, which will take place on Hawaii Public Radio at a TBD time.

OMyG…  Enjoy the tide, ride, ride.  Though I may not ride a wave on a board I ride waves in life.  The great sets, the great rides keep me going.  The ones that were hollow, well, that’s where I begin to question.

Well, that was general… If this was Fight Club, I’d be Jack’s Angry Something or Some Such.  What do you expect?  You get what you ask for.  Wasn’t even the one who got the reading but was powerful enough to plant the seed.  Strange this life.  Right when I think I got something figured out, I’m given an entirely new equation to ponder.  Maybe only Death, Sweet Death is the balance.  I know it is because it’s the soul liberation but I’ve still work to do it would seem.

And therein lies the rub, is the work inner or outer?  Is it not always a bit of both?  If the answer is the Soul’s Freedom, then why does the Soul choose to release it’s all-knowing to the Conscious Mind and strive to work back to it?  I write this blog today, Dear Reader, maybe with a name, maybe we met, maybe not, maybe just to bounce ideas off within so that I can understand what it is that is challenging me. Probably all of the above.

Am I unhappy?  No.  Tired?  Perhaps.  Perplexed?  A bit.  I like that, it’s like starting a new, I aced a sequence the other day and now I’ve been given another twist to consider.

Dot dot dot…

I even was passed by a woman I dated in a car.  Second time in a week.  Different woman but odd coincidence, the timing of it.  Why do I notice these things?  These details?  I won’t even go into the amount of details I see and put together, see how the dots connect.

So many times I feel like I am awake in a dream, my dreams at night are as real in feeling lately as my waking experiences, they almost are the same, in fact, what they are is they are unmasked, that’s probably why I respect them so much.  They are unbridled energy as it is felt and experienced without the filter of the Conscious Mind.  Is this what consciousness is about?  Is my quest enlightenment?  I ask, I pose these questions and thoughts because I thought the purpose was to live fully.  I thought I was getting what that meant.

It accelerates.  The energy of the Earth.  Of expansion, or so “they,” whoever they is, say.  I notice and see things that very few relate to.  Does that scare me?  No.  But the fact that I am also but a man does.  I used to loathe my humanity.  Now I relish in it.  I don’t loathe my Spirit but I don’t feel entirely welcome in it either.

There is conflict…  A twist, a resistance.  I am pacing myself but this time it’s not my conscious mind, it’s the Diamond within, that guy, is pacing this.  I’m on to it.  The observer that is.  Why are we pacing if flight is possible?  What am I missing?

These blogs get longer and longer.

Ah, upon the edit, I yearn for balance.  I see the beauty of both sides, I just want to have the 50 yard line seats.

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