Perusing the Halls of Draft Folder, found another Pearl that seems applicable in sharing that I began some time ago. In part this is inspired because recently a friend told me: I hope you haven’t lost that part of you, that you haven’t given up on True Love.
I don’t know where to begin with this nor do I know how to begin this so I’m just going to Flow because on a subject that can’t be truly defined, how does one even try to define something?
As I’ve been writing A Call to Love, a book/message I felt utterly compelled to write, and written many different drafts, seemingly waiting for my own True Love, I’ve come to see truly how only Death is the ending, at least in this life, and even then, it’s not really an end but a transition. If the Spirit moves on, as I believe, then there’s more even to this adventure in the time to follow. So why does my life have to wait until True Love in the Flesh to be awesome? It doesn’t! And is not True Love about finding Love within?
Who? What? Where? Why? How does one even go about such a task.
Man, the way I’ve learned to love myself is through acceptance. I accept that I love previous relationship partners through all things I’ve been through since because those experiences are just something that touched my Heart and it’s who I am. My friend thinks I just need to get laid and while I won’t agree or refute that idea, lol, I feel it’s important to acknowledge these things that I have been denying because in failing to acknowledge elements of my being in the past, that is what caused imbalance and lashing out on my part in other experiences. I suppose I am striving to embrace all of the experience, not hinder parts of it. It’s a taste of freedom in some ways.
I accept that I will go above and beyond to serve, I may not like it always but by remembering that is just a part of who I am, it is easier to allow. I also accept that I have a bullshit threshold and I have to check that and acknowledge it or else I’ll start to resent service. I accept that it’s okay to walk away from something and it’s also cool to see something from start to finish.
I am impulsive, I am impatient, I am restless but I don’t have to act on all of that. I am also kind, calm, and focused. We are all things at all times, what we choose to act from, choosing to respond to life versus reacting. We have a choice and I have been choosing to see my humanity, my Spirit, side-by-side, not one above the other but equally valuable.
What I’m trying to say is that I accept that I am Human with a Soul. And all the ways of describing it are helping me to have an endless Love with Life itself. I have found Truth in that and so I haven’t given up on True Love, I’ve just finally allowed it to be anywhere, anyhow, without constraints, without pressure, but just as it is: Free and Flowing all around.
“I was asking for a sign and there below in the water, I saw something shiny, I reached for it and it was a rock in the shape of a Heart, and for the first time in my Life, I got what you have been saying, that God and Love are One in the same.” ~ The same friend who told me I just needed to get laid.