Growing up in Hawaii I hated this color just as much as so many,
The White American Male, the Caucasian Killer, we the “walking talking exigent circumstances”
We, “we straight nightmares,” when pale ghosts that look like us arrived on these shores, haunting, plotting, with terror
blowing up a culture
Growing up I hated this color
Or as we say lovingly here
Fuck you haole
If I could
Rip this mask off
And show my Souls face
Free from clowning
Free from frowning
Free from drowning
In this repressed depression
That I been Reppin’ for so many long years
Tattooed my skin to tell the story from within and so at last I could be okay to feel the wind upon said skin
Okinawan, Chinese, Irish, English, German my Chinese Grandma last name was Hee and Everyone knew she was Hawaiian
A year before she died we found 9 decades a lie for on the birth certificate of her Own Grandmother was the words that read
And the most important one
I guess it is okay now, right, after all a man told me once, we didn’t know you were a half breed
And then one day as I was walking down the street, this Brother, I can say that right? Well I can’t take it back. Sigh. My man rolls up and I am not making this up, he says:
Chocolate! Chocolate! My Brother you are Chocolate! We talk for awhile and it was truly random, from the Lakers to the Warriors, to Cali, then he said Chocolate, you sexy, man you handsome. But here’s one thing, don’t get no more tattoos, why you covering up your skin, everything about you is Chocolate, and guess what, your Chocolate is within you.
He took my hand and shook it, my Brother Vincent wouldn’t let it go, he said Chocolate I love you. And then he let it go. I am secure enough in who I am to tell that to another man but before I let you go will you shake my hand again?
I shook his hand again and he looked me in the eye. He said guess what to me and my friend, this is a good man here, and that’s no lie. He let my hand go and he said just listen, one more thing, I’ma call you Chocolate Biscuit, now through your Chocolate Soul let sweetness that ring.
So when I say Brother, truly this man saw me as such. Reminds of a time back in college when the Hawaiians said I wasn’t white, I was just light-skinned Hawaiian.
I hated this whiteness, couldn’t stand the reflection. All I wished when I was younger was to not draw any attention
To my skin
And the sin
Of those I never knew
Committed so much evil
Just because it is true
Evil lives within our beings if we don’t keep it in check. So fuck all the bullshit and let it go cause Stay one choice to live lidat. Yeah we can’t impact the powers that be the way they are. But we each can touch a life each day whether that is at home, at work, in a post, on a stage here, or in a bar.
Let us rewind I don’t hate my skin so much I think I am just disappointed.
That despite the man who gave his life that we be anointed and despite the man who sat beneath the tree that we be free and despite those, all those and these beautiful women who gave so much of their lives to be our mothers that gave those two men so many of faith follow, and each and everyone of us, life, I am disappointed
That we don’t know the unconditional love of a mother, for one another.
Chocolate Biscuit you one sexy man!
I never thought I was good looking because the color of my skin, I never thought I belonged here in my home, the islands where Aloha called me, to serve, to speak, this place where I was born and my family on both sides dates back to a time when the Queen wasn’t locked up on house arrest and the rich motherfuckers plotted to make more money see.
You see we got it all wrong. God sends the sun to shine and rain to fall on all of us regardless of our color, the true divide, where hate resides, if I may OPINE originates from another
An evil so powerful that those who wield it cannot see, that when We stand next to them, all they feel is here is another lesser, a lesser less than me.
So they play us against each other
You see these wealthy swine perpetuate discord to serve themselves. War here, peace there they couldn’t care so long as it doesn’t negatively impact their books and balance statements.
Wake up people, stop being racist, the battle shouldn’t be against each other, when we more alike and the rich enemy, forgot, they the other. Not the other way around. They’re the minority. They the 1% be scared.
Let’s rally and unite because there is more alike between the races than we been playin
Let’s learn to celebrate our differences and embrace where we align. Cause isn’t it about damn time?
If the life of the land is perpetuated in righteousness than what the fuck are we doing? There is more to life and love than a cycle of screwing another soul just because we have been taught to hate the mask.
Cause One day we all lose our masks, all times up and those left can either be brewing in the same mess or cooking up a delicious melting pot of stew, the blend of flavor just perfect, each parts need, just like we, just like you.
Thank you, Now it is time for dessert, the chocolate biscuit has been baked, and is happy to serve you.
“Who got the vibe? It’s The Tribe y’all”
On the speaker y’all, As I stand tall
Despite All, This weight on my shoulders
That’s been beating me down
The worst bit of it is from and because
My Ego is legit
A cold-ass mother fucker
But eh, I cannot stress
It’s All Good, I can rest
The variety ranges
So many cages
And you wonder why I rages
Wonder why I rages
As the tide shifts, I be the one that lifts
The collective over the rift
What can I say, curse, nah, my gift
Next track, “I suck at love, I think I need a do-over.” Raps Hova
“What’s your hardest vice to give up?” She asks me next.
Rolling the dice, when it comes to my Life, is perhaps then, my biggest vice…
Brah, that’s just for leisure.
Nah, that’s never been my scene.
Rock n Roll?
Not quite my style either.
I guess that means temptations, but before that let me digress
Cause when I was still small kid kine
Alls I wanted was just a One
Then Life unfolds, Truth be told
Truth be told, Life just unfolds
Never thought I’d be this Old, when my name was just Young
Couldn’t see beyond age 23, when in July, Spirit spoke to me, and
Ever since, ever since that premonition haunts me
Forty years or so
Before you begin to wonder
If it’s your time to go
And if your work here is done…
And since that ever since, the clock, it ticks, the clock talk: ticks.
I’m about a third through, two thirds left, I thought you knew, that’s why you’re gathered here right? To hear from The Prophet, before they slit his throat some night. No, Jay! No, not Here, not in this Life. No my Teacher said, they not gone lynch ya. Some will say, the color of skin, it will protect you, but that don’t mean shit to you because you’ve hated this color ever since, yeah? Isn’t that part of the reason you colored over it, to tell the story that speaks from your Soul? Kinda but not really…
Fuck you haole!
I cannot even begin to say
That’s not your Mom, Larry.
My Dad shared once to me, they told me she wasn’t my Grandma, guess things don’t change much now do they
This racial hurt, divides too many
Tell me who, what, where, when, why, how
Can we overcome such inequity?
Forty years left, oh if only it was 40 ounces, though about two-thirds through that, it wouldn’t be so cold, in fact, it would be warm and bitter. Is that what I’ve got to look ahead to? Is that the meaningless Life of a Sinner?
Which segues nicely back to the Flesh and my biggest vice, where I’m weak, though I know better, shit, when within, Inner Child rises up each moment, cheering, no, not this Life, not this time, we’re all Here & Now to be Winners.
“Fuck all this pretty shit my name is” Jay, as Hova continues.
If you know, me, then you know I wear black to cover the blood on my sleeve
From this Heart that beat-beats
Roll the dice? Nah, I’m a beast mode, enter cheat codes, take the Ego out and cheat its slow suffering march to Death. Live fully, each day, until I’ve no more work left.
Live Life fully, that We can truly
See, the Love, that exists, free
From judgment as The Creator
Intended for We
Set We Free
Cause We the People, The Power is the People, and We All meant to be
What a Dream! And I’m The Dream Pusher
And this is Prophecy.
Are you ready to take a hit
Of my words? Just one get your Ego faded Here,
Give some time for Spirit, Lift ya up, Now.
Fear the Unknown.
Nah, that tagline’s dated.
Just one hit of my words,
Get you Lifted. So Bless up.
Let’s all get faded on that Spiritual
Take a trip
It’s the only essence really real
Let’s get lifted up on the Spiritual
It’s the only high that gives you wings
Let’s elevate our consciousness
It’s the only way to heal the mass that”s why
Let’s Love with our Hearts so Free, So Free
It’s the only way to live, Now
“I’m your Pusha”
It’s time we grind,
Who’s feeling me?
I’ve written these words delivered to you straight outta Ether
If you’ve seen your evil, you’d have nothing to lose either
Once called The Speaker
But refusing to believe her
Now here I stand
Wind beneath my wings
In prayer, my hands
From the heart, the Word sings
I’m fraught with distraught at all we’ve been taught
My Soul burns hot, in this vessel
It will for always, so long as it’s bound in this shell
If hell exists
It’s only in Mind
So stay in Heart and realign
Stay in Heart
Because when the ship sets sail
It’s bow will be lit with flames
In reaching shore, glory has nothing to gain
rhymes upon rhymes, lines followed by lines, time after time, Alone, time after time, reflecting, writing, dreaming, seeking meaning
all the damn time, seeking meaning, that’s just how I’m schemin’
Catch my meaning?
if I sound pissed you missed the message: “Let’s Wake the ‘Folk’ Up”
A mission, spiritual directive
for the masses, my only incentive, Fight on, Step Up, Lift Off, Now
Like Slow flow, I’m Gospel
New Age? Nah, Apostle
Can’t fly, Impossible
These emotions, they raw still
Deny pain, too hostile
Chase fame, unsustainable
Embrace gain, preposterous
Release chains, we got this
Step back, now watch the shift
Breathe deep, I flow quick
Inhale, that’s next yo
Your Soul, Incredible
Let’s go! Let’s go! Let
The Sun has risen
All Sing, we forgiven
Cause Nothing’s ever missin’
So Why you stuck wishin’
Cause our wings, a given’
If you could see my eyes just once then my Heart you would know is the same that beats w/in You. Now,
Let’s go… Let’s go… LET
You know when I met you, I thought I met you, but I guess you, I guess you hadn’t yet met you, and The Truth is, I hadn’t yet met me either. Now once more I was left a mess because my ego, my ego couldn’t rest, and that you, that I thought that I knew, was nothing new, nothing more than a projection, my own machination.
This part redacted for family friendly audiences aka bleep me and definitely bleep my imagination when it comes to ego based creation.
It’s not that words can’t dance like hearts, were they only free, problem is the mind’s convoluted, and in hindsight, it’s apparently just me, that felt the Love that we shared deep within the moment, and now I’m alone in seeing what I saw, feeling what I feel, see
Set pen to paper, let these fingers dance upon them keys cause I never knew freedom with you, the only freedom I know, is the freedom,
So what can I be, than anything less than me? And anything more, that’s just not meant to be. Now, Let me sing a song or write a verse or two, while some out there grazing, I’m Here & Now gazing, and no disrespect, to you, this Path is mine, just meant for me. And, I free you to do you on yours.
So why then, don’t they just let me be?
Enter stage left, The Ego creeps on in, it’s about to get me wrecked, will I ever win. I’m terrified, I’ve never shied from challenges, and yet,
this one is daunting, the past is over, but why is it, why is it so haunting, stop your shouting, oh great, now you’re pouting, take a drink, then a hit, next morning, my head’s pounding, been sober ever since, but still, here’s my heart, and it’s throbbing.
You see, I sought to make peace, in order to release, yet the anger, it’s a beast, the hurt, it is what it is, but THE ANGER, what a bleep bleep bleeping beast.
And beneath the anger, a beautiful Inner Child cries out, in tears, yearning, to be set free. If I can put anger down just long enough to give myself a hug, than at last, at last, at last, I might, just might, be able to breathe.
When at last, I might be free. Then all these years after years, pages upon pages, the musings that I’ve had, coupled with reflections of the sages, deconstructing the mystic work of mages, to finally realize, the joke’s on me, cause we live in the ages, where all that’s sacred
But what’s famous with the rest, kids?
What’s famous without the lamest?
What’s the rage without our cages?
Plato’s ankle bracelets from the cave posted to the ‘Gram, kids,
check your pockets, purses, wrists and now wa-tch, this.
As I part the veil, never one to sell short, never one to tell the Truth that it’s a lie, the Sun is shining brightly, the weather’s pretty fly. I might not be rocking dem Jay’s, but these NMDs sure give me a Boost and if I’m branding it’s cause the fight on, the fight is on, THE FIGHT IS ON.
And I showed up here for spiritual battle, not yesterday, not tomorrow, but Here & Now, so that as a collective, we might rise above Soul’s Darkest Night.
You see we each occupy an energy that becomes manifest. And when I saw a real shadow for the first time that led me out the cave, then I finally caught a glimpse of the Sun just rise up past the veil, I took them old projections, gave it a pat on the back and said, oh well Pulling in all my resources, so that, so that, so that the storm of consciousness could finally rest.
Told the Ego take a knee as I bowed my head and prayed, and to Love, I said, thanks for the test, thanks for those blessings, cause nothing’s guaranteed, this day might not even last. Then, one day, I got up and out of my way.
So you, you, you, her, him, and that one over there too, if there’s one thing you take away from me tonight, let it be this:
The only scrap that matters is the one that’s for your Soul. Put down your phone for a second, let your eyes adjust to know. Listen up for for Love’s sermons as they permeate the air, open your ears, listen close and you’ll find Love is always near, for every time the wind brushes aside your hair, the waves crash, the sun rises and sets, it’s all messages just messages in the ether so be aware.
Look at me, I ain’t that young but I’m not that old either. Yet I spoke, did you listen? If you did, I guarantee there’s something opening, guess what, that’s your Soul, its ready to glisten and
Shine that Inner Light
So what if the famous are Sacred and the media says this, that, whatever. All that matters is the moment, and that’s what’s pretty clever.
Freedom is the only thing I’ve ever felt. Freedom is the only thing I’ve ever sought. Freedom is the only thing worth being free
Because without that, Love, what’s good with being?
Because without that, Love, what world are we seeing?
Because without that, Love, what messages are we hearing?
Because without that, Love, are we really, believing?
This cycle can go on, and on, and on, for only so long, before this Flesh gone, so Light up before it’s too long, Light up before it’s too long, Light up before the Soul moves
And my time is up.